29 January 2012

Why I Was Blessed to be Hit by a Semi

So, as most of you know, my car was rear ended by a semi truck a week ago (hence my long absence! sorry!). While I did receive an external head injury (stitches and 16 staples across the back of my head!) and did a number on my hands, I basically walked away from what could have (or should have) been a far more tragic accident.

For whatever reason, I was not nearly as upset as everyone else was, or, perhaps, as much as I should have been. Truthfully, I felt it was an awesome accident to have, if one is going to get in an accident.

Not too long ago I asked you all where your joy lies. In keeping with the mentality that joy can be found in anything, I want to share why it was a blessing to be hit by a semi truck.

- My daughter was not in the car. She was SUPPOSED to be in the car, but my husband found a last minute baby sitter (his boss). I don't think I even need to go into that one, do I? That blessing is pretty self explanatory - even if she had been fine, she would have had to listen to my screams, watch the semi hit (she's still rear facing) and deal with her mama bleeding from the head and being taken to the ER in an ambulance (while my husband was stuck out of town so he couldn't come get her and we have NO family/friends here so no one to call but my husband's boss!). What would I have done with her? Obviously she couldn't have stayed on the side of the road, or come with, or.. well... she wasn't in the car.

- I am a D*** good driver. I mean that. Even after this accident I am completely confident in my skills. I steered the car after I was hit and managed to aim for the small (car sized) opening between the trees rather than amplify the situation with a head on collision. I also didn't flip the car - according to both the tow truck drivers the car SHOULD (not could) have flipped and rolled. They were amazed at my driving skills. I promise you, God had the wheel and guided my hands.

- The semi truck and driver were FINE. This might seem like a weird blessing, but think what could have happened if it had been a car with a family of four. What if they had a 6 week old who couldn't have withstood the impact? My heart clenches to imagine the sorrow if the accident had involved another family or individual whose car might have flipped/rolled/been more totaled than mine, causing massive injury. I am truly, truly grateful that I was hit by a semi truck which sustained minimum damage and the driver was ok.

- I learned I need to slow down. Not just in driving (actually I was going 10-15 under the speed limit due to the weather... and I've driven in worse conditions, it really was a freak accident) but in life. I was so unreasonably upset that my husband was stranded in Chicago O'Hare that I became this monster who felt victimized by the situation. All I could see were my dreams and my plans fading into the background yet again. Now, unfortunately, this might be a bit of a theme in this blog as one of my reasons for starting this is to come to grips with my current reality, but I promise I will share my growth as an adult just as much, hopefully more, than my disappointments as a child. When I called my clients to tell them I would have to cancel I was SO EMBARRASSED. ASHAMED. At that moment I realized that calling them asking to reschedule due to weather and my husband's predicament was far less intimidating than calling them to say I'd been in a car accident. They would have been perfectly delightful and happy to accommodate. Instead I got so bull headed and so stubborn that I refused to cancel. I hate asking people for help and it came back to bite me. Thank goodness I was not so stubborn I refused to take Miss O to DH's boss's house to babysit!

I have often said that I struggle to hear God's whispers so he often has to shout his advice loud and clear. Ok, I also told my husband God tends to talk to me like we're in Mission Impossible, too. ;) Hey - we all have our own relationship with our beliefs/creators/ect..and I like adventure! I think this was God telling me I need to work on my marriage, my motherhood, my business, my friendships, and my self esteem rather than run them all over in my haste to prove my point. I don't even think I have a point. I talk WAY too much. I should probably work on that, too..

I would love to hear about a time when you felt like you were missing the point or not hearing what someone was saying until it was LOUD and CLEAR (and perhaps a bit over the top!). Or are you some one who catches the small details?

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